Divorce has a way of bringing the worst out in people. It can be an isolating, painful experience. Those who feel hurt often choose to lash out at others, and that's when divorce gets messy. One spouse decides he or she wants to use the children to prove a point. It may seem like obtaining custody is a means of "winning" the divorce and punishing the other parent. Sadly, it's often the children who pay, socially and emotionally, when parents refuse to work together in a divorce.